TOEFL TPO -1 Writing Task 1 Sample: Summerize the point made in the lecture, being used to explain how the cast doubt specfic points made in the reading passage.
旧版托福格式的用户历史样本与AI评估结果。
共 1 份历史用户样本
旧版托福题型
本题目来自托福考试的旧版本。当前托福已采用不同的考试结构。这些历史样本仅作为练习参考保留。
题目概览
阅读段落
People across North America and elsewhere who enjoy watching birds put out devices called bird feeders and continually supply them with seed. This practice is especially popular during the fall and winter, when natural food sources for the birds become scarce. However, these well-meaning bird lovers are not doing the birds any favors, feeding them throughout the fall and into the winter months can harm birds in several ways. First, feeders encourage many birds to gather in one place and thus facilitate the spread of diseases. A particularly pointed example of this may well be house finches, a species commonly drawn to feeders. This species has experienced an epidemic of infectious eye disease and its population has declined by 60 percent in the last decade. Feeders may have accelerated the spread of the disease by encouraging house finches to gather in concentrated numbers. Second, when people put feeders near their homes, they are exposing birds to several dangers. Predators such as hour cats and hawks find it easy to catch and eat birds that come to the feeders. Furthermore, when frightened birds attempt to escape from predators, they often fly directly into the windows of nearby houses and cars because they cannot see these dangerous obstacles. Millions of birds die from the combined effects of predators and window strike every year. Third, bird feeders could encourage birds that typically migrate to warmer areas during the winter to remain in areas they would otherwise leave, thus disrupting the natural order. Birds delayed in their winter migration could be injured or killed by harsh weather they would otherwise have avoided, or they may miss their chance to pair up with mates because they arrived late to breeding grounds.
题目
Summerize the point made in the lecture, being used to explain how the cast doubt specfic points made in the reading passage.
用户样本与评估结果
用户样本
The writer argues that bird feeders have detrimental influence on birds. However, the professor oppose them one by one. First of all, according to the reading passage, when birds gather together, all kinds of birds will bring diverse diseases to the whole specie. Nevertheless, the professor in the listening contends that natural factors take the major role in spreading diseases. For example,house finches like moving in groups and constantly move into new areas, so they inevitably contact with other area’s groups. Due to the large scale of the group, it is easy to see the disease move rapidly in the species. Therefore, birds feeders didn’t play important role in spreading disease. Moreover, the author puts emphasis on such a fact that providing food will cause birds attacked by predator, and lots of birds will strike windows and hurt. On the contrary, the professor mentions that the feeders will provide a new kinds of nutrition to birds, which can make birds to become more healthy and stronger. In addition, the new nutrition can increase the reproductive success of birds, so they can raise more young birds, and the whole population of the birds increases, which outweighs the loss from the predators. Therefore, birds feeders will not help the birds population to decline. Finally, the writer states that bird feeders will disrupt the process of migration, causing miss the chance to breed next generation.By contrast ,the professor claims that the reason to decide migration is sunlight. Because the days becomes shorter and shorter, birds realize the winter is coming. In addition, putting food outside just provide new nutrition for them instead of a signal for winter.
评估结果
1.子项得分 Task fulfillment: 4 Organization: 3 Coherence and Cohesion: 3 Language Use: 3
2.预估分数 Estimated Score: 22
3.任务完成度 整体来说，文章回答了题目要求的问题，但是在某些方面还有待提高。首先，在引入听力部分的论点时，可以更具体地描述听力中的例子和细节。其次，在比较阅读和听力观点时，可以更明确地表达出两者之间的矛盾和相互驳斥。
示例1（改进前）：Nevertheless, the professor in the listening contends that natural factors take the major role in spreading diseases. 示例1（改进后）：However, the professor in the lecture contends that natural factors, such as house finches' tendency to fly together in large groups and constantly move to new areas, play a more significant role in spreading diseases.
示例2（改进前）：On the contrary, the professor mentions that the feeders will provide a new kinds of nutrition to birds, which can make birds to become more healthy and stronger. 示例2（改进后）：On the contrary, the professor argues that bird feeders provide additional nutrition to birds, making them healthier and stronger, which leads to higher reproductive success and ultimately increases their population.
4.文章结构与组织 The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing each point from the reading passage and lecture, and a conclusion. However, there is room for improvement in terms of organization and coherence. The introduction could be more concise and clearly state the main points of disagreement between the reading and the lecture. Additionally, transitions between ideas and paragraphs could be smoother, making the essay easier to follow.
Suggestions for improvement:
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Make the introduction more concise and clearly state the main points of disagreement between the reading and the lecture.
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Use clear transitions between ideas and paragraphs to improve coherence.
Example 1 (Before): The writer argues that bird feeders have detrimental influence on birds. However, the professor oppose them one by one. Example 1 (After): The writer argues that bird feeders have a detrimental influence on birds, while the professor refutes these claims by addressing each point raised in the reading passage.
Example 2 (Before): Therefore, birds feeders didn’t play important role in spreading disease. Example 2 (After): As a result, bird feeders do not play a significant role in spreading diseases among birds as claimed in the reading passage.
5. 语法批改
The writer argues that bird feeders have detrimental influence on birds. However, the professor opposeopposes them one by one.
First of all,Firstly, according to the reading passage, when birds gather together, all kinds of birds will bring diverse diseases to the whole specie.species. Nevertheless, the professor in the listening contends that natural factors take the major role in spreading diseases. For example,houseexample, house finches like moving in groups and constantly move into new areas, soareas. So, they inevitably contact with other area'sareas' groups. Due to the large scale of the group, it is easy to see the disease move rapidly in the species. Therefore, birds feeders didn'tdo not play important role in spreading disease.
Moreover, the author puts emphasis on such athe fact that providing food will cause birds attacked by predator, and lots ofpredators, and many birds will strike windows and hurt. On the contrary, the professor mentions that the feeders will provide a new kindskind of nutrition to birds, which can make birds to become more healthy and stronger. In addition,Additionally, the new nutrition can increase the reproductive success of birds, so they can raise more young birds, and the whole population of the birds increases, whichincreases. This outweighs the loss from the predators. Therefore, birds feeders will not help the birdsbirds' population to decline.
Finally, the writer states that bird feeders will disrupt the process of migration, causing miss the chance to breed next generation.By contrast ,thegeneration. By contrast, the professor claims that the reason to decide migration is sunlight. Because the days becomesbecome shorter and shorter, birds realize thethat winter is coming. In addition,Additionally, putting food outside just provideprovides new nutrition for them instead of a signal for winter.
Section Title: 6.文章修订
The author of the reading passage contends that bird feeders have a negative impact on birds, while the professor in the lecture disputes these points one by one.
Firstly, the reading passage asserts that when birds congregate around feeders, they become more susceptible to spreading diseases among their species. However, the professor argues that natural factors play a more significant role in disease transmission. As an example, house finches tend to travel in large groups and frequently move to new areas where they interact with other groups. Due to the size and mobility of these groups, diseases can spread rapidly among them. Thus, bird feeders do not play a crucial role in disease propagation.
Secondly, the author emphasizes that providing food for birds increases their risk of being attacked by predators and colliding with windows. In contrast, the professor highlights that bird feeders offer additional nutrition which can make birds healthier and stronger. This increased vitality leads to higher reproductive success rates, allowing them to raise more offspring. Consequently, the overall bird population grows despite losses from predation and window collisions. Therefore, bird feeders do not contribute to a decline in bird populations.
Lastly, the writer claims that bird feeders disrupt migration patterns and hinder breeding opportunities for future generations. The professor counters this point by stating that sunlight is the primary factor influencing migration decisions; as days grow shorter, birds recognize that winter is approaching. Furthermore, providing food through bird feeders merely offers supplementary nutrition rather than serving as an indicator of seasonal change. (258 words)
Section Title: 7. Essay Revision
The writer argues author of the reading passage contends that bird feeders have a detrimental influence on birds. However, birds, while the professor oppose them in the lecture disputes these points one by one. one (Changed "oppose them" to "disputes these points" for clarity and proper phrasing).
First of all, according to the reading passage, when birds gather together, all together at feeders, they become more susceptible to spreading diseases among their species (Changed "all kinds of birds will bring diverse diseases to the whole specie. specie" for clarity and proper phrasing). Nevertheless, the professor in the listening contends that natural factors take play a more significant role in disease transmission (Changed "take the major role in spreading diseases. diseases" for clarity and proper phrasing). For example,house example, house finches like moving in tend to travel in large groups and constantly frequently move into to new areas, so areas where they inevitably contact interact with other area’s groups. Due to the large scale of the group, it is easy to see the size and mobility of these groups, diseases can spread rapidly among them. Thus, bird feeders do not play a crucial role in disease move rapidly in the species. Therefore, birds feeders didn’t propagation (Changed "didn't play important role in spreading disease. disease" for proper grammar).
Moreover, the author puts emphasis on such a fact that providing food will cause birds attacked by predator, and lots of birds will strike windows and hurt. hurt (Rephrased sentence for clarity). On the contrary, the professor mentions that the feeders will provide a new kinds of bird feeders offer additional nutrition to birds, which can make birds to become more healthy healthier and stronger. In addition, the this increased vitality leads to higher reproductive success rates, allowing them to raise more offspring (Changed "the new nutrition can increase the reproductive success of birds, so they can raise more young birds, and the whole increase..." for better flow). Consequently, the overall bird population of the birds increases, which outweighs the loss grows despite losses from the predators. predation and window collisions. Therefore, birds feeders will bird feeders do not help the birds population to decline. contribute to a decline in bird populations.
Finally, the writer states that bird feeders will disrupt the process of migration, causing miss the chance to breed next generation.By migration patterns and hinder breeding opportunities for future generations. By contrast ,the professor claims that the reason to decide sunlight is the primary factor influencing migration decisions; as days grow shorter, birds recognize that winter is sunlight. Because approaching (Changed "Because the days becomes shorter and shorter, birds realize the winter is coming. coming" for proper grammar). In addition, putting providing food outside just provide new through bird feeders merely offers supplementary nutrition for them instead of a signal for winter.rather than serving as an indicator of seasonal change.
8. Mind Map
1. Introduction
- Reading passage: negative impact of bird feeders
- Lecture: disputes these points
2. Disease Transmission
- Reading: bird feeders increase disease spread
- Lecture: natural factors play a more significant role
- Example: house finches and their mobility
3. Predation and Window Collisions
- Reading: bird feeders increase risks
- Lecture: bird feeders offer additional nutrition, leading to higher reproductive success rates
- Result: overall bird population grows despite losses
4. Migration Patterns and Breeding Opportunities
- Reading: bird feeders disrupt migration patterns, hinder breeding opportunities
- Lecture: sunlight is the primary factor influencing migration decisions; bird feeders offer supplementary nutrition only
5. Conclusion
- Bird feeders do not have a significant negative impact on birds as claimed in the reading passage.
9. Keywords
| Word | Phonetic Symbol | Part of Speech | English Definition | Simplified Chinese Translation | Sample Sentence |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| congregate | /ˈkɒŋɡrɪɡeɪt/ | verb | gather into a crowd or mass | 聚集，集合 | Birds often congregate around the feeder in the garden. |
| susceptible | /səˈsɛptəbəl/ | adjective | likely or liable to be influenced or harmed by a particular thing | 易受影响的，易受伤害的 | The birds are more susceptible to diseases when they gather around the feeder. |
| propagate | /ˈprɒpəɡeɪt/ | verb | spread and promote (an idea, theory, etc.) widely | 传播，繁殖 | Diseases can propagate rapidly among large groups of birds. |
| vitality | /vaɪˈtalɪti/ | noun | the state of being strong and active; energy | 活力，生命力 | The additional nutrition from bird feeders increases the birds' vitality. |
| reproductive success | /rɪˈprəʊdʌktɪv səkˈsɛs/ | noun phrase | the passing of genes onto the next generation in a way that they too can pass on those genes | 繁殖成功率 | Bird feeders lead to higher reproductive success rates among birds. |
| predation | /prɪˈdeɪʃən/ | noun | the preying of one animal on others; a predator's act of killing and eating other animals for food | 捕食，掠食行为 | Despite losses from predation, bird populations continue to grow. |
| migration | /maɪˈɡreɪʃən/ | noun | seasonal movement of animals from one region to another for breeding or other purposes | 迁徙，移居 | Bird feeders do not disrupt migration patterns as claimed in the reading passage. |
| supplementary | /ˈsʌpləmənt(ə)ri/ | adjective | additional; added to supply what is lacking or missing, especially in terms of nutrition or knowledge | 补充的，增补的 | Bird feeders provide supplementary nutrition for birds during winter months. |
| indicator | /ˈindikādər/ | noun | a thing, especially a trend or fact, that indicates the state or level of something | 指示物，指标 | Bird feeders are not an indicator of seasonal change for birds. |
| seasonal change | /ˈsiːzənəl tʃeɪndʒ/ | noun phrase | a change in the environment or weather patterns that occurs at certain times of the year | 季节变化 | Birds rely on sunlight as a primary factor to recognize seasonal changes. |
